Appearance

On the beach, Greenpeace activists keep pushing him back into the water because they think he's a beached whale... but okay, it's not that critical yet, no crane required... water level's dropping... he's occasionally tried to move around a bit and burn off the extra bacon... instead of a belly he has a soft, sexy little cushion... next year he wants to sign up for a belly-dancing course too... then once someone's lying comfortably on it, he'll upgrade it to a massage cushion... otherwise pretty normal = a primate of the genus homo homo sapiens (though about that second homo I'm not always entirely sure), male, with everything that comes with it...

Eye color

Brown, almost black, and red when photographed with flash... he wants to get a contact lens (not the legume kind) to put over his right eye with a yellow smiley face on it - a happy one... and then just a pirate-style eyepatch over the left eye, and his dream look would be complete... he has "X-ray" vision and a stare that kills if someone wakes him up too early at work... sometimes his eyes even spark, but you don't want to see that, what if it starts a fire...

Eyesight

Excellent, and it keeps improving from working at a computer... no really - when he was little, he wore glasses... now he doesn't need them anymore (dzI/Optics haven't been invented yet)... he can even see 3D pictures... but if he does that too often, he starts looking Chinese... his newest goal is to have eyesight like a lynx... because what could be wrong with seeing sharp and clear...

Hair color

Brown, mostly - well, all 7 of them... but soon even those will fall out... what does he need hair for anyway... he plucked his feathers out long ago... grey hairs keep creeping in and he can't figure out why... he doesn't do anything (bad) to them and this is how they repay him...

Waviness and other hair upgrades

Short to shoulder-length, currently a total mess and unkempt... have you seen that shampoo ad? what do monkeys do at night? suitable as a scarecrow...

Build

A bit on the well-fed side... sometimes a bit more than that... well, at least he won't rattle around in the coffin... kills him, if he feels like it? even the worms need to eat too... why not give them a proper feast... his own theory is that he drank a lot of milk as a kid and has strong, heavy bones, so his weight is just about right...

Sports he actively practices or used to practice

Hiking, skiing, rollerblading, badminton, swimming... he calls himself a passive athlete... one of the few active sports he ever practiced was rollerblading along the dam... sometimes it was also constantly running up the stairs to the 5th floor in a building with no elevator... sometimes even 4 times a day... believe me, his tongue was hanging out all the way to the ground... later he even advanced to the pro league... he started taking the stairs two at a time... his latest sport that he's really taken a liking to is "ping-pong"... it's interesting playing ping-pong alone, where you have to sprint to the other side of the table before the ball you just hit from the first side gets there...

Sports he watches

Hockey, tennis, motorsports... but only rarely... when he manages to hit the right button on the remote... and of course Slovakiaaaaaaa, come on, come on, go get 'em... he considers the greatest sporting experience of his life to be attending the 2004 Hockey World Championships in Ostrava, where our boys slapped the Danes 8:0, and where he cheered so hard he lost his voice for a week...

Likes movies

Action, alternative, comedy, romance, TV series, documentaries, mystery, sci-fi, fantasy, historical, erotic, drama... there's no film he wouldn't watch at least once... he loves the Fifth Element with Czech dubbing (time is not important, only life is important)... he can laugh himself silly at a good comedy... shrek is da best... he prefers movies in the original language with subtitles... the only dubbed movies worth watching are the ones with Polish dubbing, where one person (the same one in every movie) narrates the entire film in a monotone voice... try watching an action or erotic one like that... watch out for your jaw -> it'll hurt...

Likes to watch a good movie

At the cinema, at home - TV, at a friend's, girlfriend's place, on the computer... he's not exactly a champion of movie theaters, but still, nothing replaces the pleasure of experiencing a work of art at the cinema, with quality sound, a bucket of popcorn (recommended dose = 5 liters per screening = american style) and a huge screen, where you have to swivel your head left and right until your neck locks up...

Likes books

Fairy tales, entertainment, games, humor, religious literature, philosophical literature, personal development, professional literature... put a book in his hand and he'll give it a try... sometimes it takes him five attempts to get through it (looking at you, Lord of the Rings) but the effort counts... there's little time for books these days... I know, I know = excuses...

Likes music

Disco, chart hits, house, techno, rap, pop, classic rock, oldies, soundtracks, musicals, punk, sappy love songs, classical music, opera, folklore and folk songs, folk and country, alternative... he listens to music even while asleep, no really... and sometimes he even composes some super powerful hit, only nobody wants to listen = heathens... lately he's found himself drawn to gentle melodies... they're so soothing... try using them as medicine, it helps him...

Goes to concerts

Rock band concerts... I think he's already been to one and will definitely go to at least one more... he's even been to a festival, twice actually... the one at Domasa was better, because Domasa's the best, Domasa's good...

The biggest relaxation is listening to music

anytime and anywhere, constantly and non-stop...

What he looks for in people

In people, he mainly looks for humanity, he looks for a real Person... he looks for love and wisdom... tolerance and understanding... feeling and level-headedness... the ability to listen... the ability to admit his own mistakes and the ability to accept another person's right to make mistakes... the ability to hear someone out, reflect, and consider or accept a different opinion or criticism, and above all the ability to forgive... which he considers the greatest expression of humanity... besides that, he looks for people he can give a piece of himself to... e.g. a shirt, trousers, cargo pants, smelly socks, and so on...

Love means to him

life without love is just a farce...

His relationship to casual sex

wait, sex? ahh, right, he's starting to vaguely recall what that might be about... it has something to do with either the digestive or the respiratory system... if he remembers correctly... the truth is he almost failed biology... as for casual sex, he never (didn't) go looking for opportunities... a good friend once told him: there can be no sex without love, nor love without sex, and that's how it should be...

His life partner should be

the basic condition his life partner must fulfill is that he must love her with his whole mind, soul, body and heart... and his partner should have the very same expectations of him...

Idea of a relaxed evening

a peaceful evening was falling over the hills, over the grey fields... a relaxed evening is when everything's chill and it doesn't matter what or where... ideally it flows smoothly out of a relaxed day with the setting of that big, hot, round thing... nooo come on, help me out... Oscar... relaxed mornings were rare for him, because that's when he had to violently tear himself out of the parallel dimensions he loved drifting through, until that miserable alarm clock rang... usually it took a few dozen tries before it managed to talk him into it... then at one point there was a phase when he tried to get up before the sun woke up and go to bed after it went off to rest on the other side of this pancake, though that phase didn't last long...

Favorite color

blue is true, green, yellow, red, purple, orange, brown, white, black, pink, and also all the others not listed here...

Zodiac sign

Taurus (Apr 21 - May 20), a crazy April one...

Religion

He's Catholic... officially... but a little bit of everything, really... a sort of buddhist-hindu-christian supporter of islam... and he's also quite fond of atheism... he relies mostly on himself and lives by the saying: Help yourself, and God will help you too... he believes there's some form of higher power that could theoretically influence events in this or other space-times, but then again: why would it bother? he pictures it as a greying little man with a walking stick and a peace pipe... this topic is too vast to define in a few words... btw. last time Jehovah's Witnesses knocked on his door... asking if they could talk to him... so he asked how many of them there were... they said two... so he replied: well then, go ahead and talk to each other...

Favorite cuisine specialties

Slovak, Italian, Chinese, Mexican, seafood, vegetarian... basically pretty much anything... the only dish he can't stand is sauteed liver (liver pate is fine though)... he's been fighting this since childhood, but hasn't managed to win... well, he's lost a few battles, but the war isn't over yet...

He enjoys good food most

in front of the TV, by candlelight with a partner, at a nice restaurant, out in nature, in bed, off his partner's belly... hmm, thinking about it, basically anywhere... by the way, what's with sayings like we eat to survive? we haven't been limited to mammoths and forest berries for a long time now... please keep that in mind...

Education completed

university degree... barely, but he made it... he sincerely thanks everyone who struggled along with him through 17 years of studying... it was a very tough road... mostly for them... forgive him... he won't do that again in his life... the discipline known as rote memorization is simply not something he can handle...

Occupation

analyst, specialist programmer... occasionally also ran his own business, but honestly only when he felt like it... for instance, last year he (didn't) feel like it at all...

Works in the field of

information technology...

Speaks the language

besides his own native tongue, he also speaks a few programming languages... he won't count those, don't worry... a bit of Czech, a bit of English, a bit of German... he also studied Russian and Italian but it did NOT go weeeell... a demonstration: adin, dva, tri, chettyre, pyat, the little rabbit went to count... and that's it, nothing more, sir - sorry comrade teacher... in Italian he only learned swear words... he'd rather not publish those here... as for where he's from, he knows (doesn't know) almost nothing in Hungarian... seginchik, seginchik = help, help... there are still a few more he's planning to learn...

His relationship to smoking

for a large part of his life he actively fought against smokers and smoking... then he went bad... life weighed him down and he gave in... every day he tries to quit and believes he'll manage it one day... EUREKA, he did it... he got rid of the addiction... now he smokes because he wants to...

His relationship to alcohol

he drinks occasionally... rarely doable ever since he's been driving a car... mostly he's the designated driver... i.e. since he was 18, and before that he couldn't either since he was still underage... but he doesn't really drool at the sight of alcohol either... though as they say: it's no joke drinking whenever you feel like it... after a few bad experiences with alcohol he realized the two of them will never (not) get along... he'll give the details verbally... good wine is (never) bad... he once read an article saying that a man who regularly consumes moderate amounts of alcohol cuts his risk of a heart attack in half... hmm, shame you can't take all those doses at once a month ahead of time...

His relationship to drugs

have you lost your mind? do you really think that after everything you've just read, this is what he's still missing for happiness? although his good friends would probably ask him right away: hey, so what are you on?

Current marital status

divorced...

Children

not counting himself, one lovely daughter and many others... because as they say... an easterner makes kids wherever he goes...

Pets

he has spiders, moths, mosquitoes and other household insects... he even has a little bird... at his childhood home, which he visits from time to time, they had a dog named Cynthia... a brother who rides in on a white horse and about a million bees... by the way, did you know that everything's for beeeep, except bees, which are for honey? the bees love him... unfortunately he doesn't return their love, and most of them die in terrible agony right after they sting him... watch out for unprotected contact...

Hobbies

photography, traveling, working with computers, reading, listening to music, watching movies, collecting things, cinema, friends, sleeping, theater... his work is his biggest hobby... otherwise he enjoys an awful lot of things... to a certain extent, and given the opportunity, he's capable of doing almost anything... at least once... well, unless he isn't... he hasn't tried bungee jumping or skydiving yet... unfortunately he knows too much about physics to take that risk... an object's momentum is directly proportional to its mass, and the force vector determines its instantaneous acceleration over time... if he applied those principles to himself, the only thing that could result is disaster... I think he'll get around to those extremes only sometime toward the end of his life... he used to just hop in the car and wander around the area, in the sense of: drive as far as the road allows, then get out and continue on foot, rolling a die at intersections to decide which way to go next...